Thursday, December 29, 2011

Christmas at Times Square

Nothing special with our Christmas this year. However, after mom and bro came back from church on Christmas morning, we decided to go to Times Square. Saja mau jalan2...

Enjoy the photos..

The giant Xmas tree of Times Square
But I think biasa2 saja


Like father like son!
Rayyan said : "mcm daddy"


Makan time!!


Cute kan the mascott
Lily takut!! Hahaha..



We have to be quick here! The kids were exhausted and refused photo-takings!

Last but not least.. US!! (My bro didn't join us as he has to work!)

So yeahh... that's my Xmas day!!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Wordless Wednesday : Wiggy Wiggy

Christmas with WIG!!!
Never imagine myself putting on a wig!
Haizzzzz....

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas!!

May joy and happiness snow on you, may the bells jingle for you and may Santa be extra good to you!
Merry Christmas to all my family, relatives, friends, blogger friends wherever you are!

With Love, Just!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Back from Port Dickson

It is really really great to be away from KL city even for 2 nites! *grin*

My last trip to PD was in 2005!! Goshhh... It was actually a last minute plan. Lucky we managed to book a room through my friend, Nora.

So, last Saturday (after Amcorp!! - yeah!! I'm still in Amcorp!), we headed to PD. Late check-in lorr...

Will story more in next entry.. Meanwhile, you guys enjoy some pics dulu k.. :)


View my room on Sunday morning

Another view

Beach-ing is a must!

Jungle trekking

Visiting muzeum

To be continued...

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Wordless Wednesday - Reading

Besides busy entertaining my kids, I spend some time for readings too.
I used to read malay novels.
Aunt E visited me last 3 weeks and promised to bring some books for me.
Two books done. Three to go!

Happy Wednesday ppl!

Thursday, December 08, 2011

Kimoterapi yang Pertama

My breast cancer journey!

Alhamdulillah sesi rawatan kimo pertama pada Sabtu lepas (3/12/11) berjalan dengan lancar.

Proses tersebut tidak la seteruk atau se-ngeri yang saya bayangkan. Mungkin juga ada nya chemo port yang memudahkan keseluruhan proses yang memakan masa selama 2 jam setengah.

Sebelum memulakan sesi rawatan kimo, saya terlebih dahulu berjumpa dengan Dr John. Beliau memeriksa bahagian luka pada chemo port saya. Beliau juga menenangkan saya agar saya lebih bersedia untuk menjalani kimo pertama saya.

Tepat jam 10 pagi, saya diminta untuk mengambil tempat di salah satu tempat duduk yang tersedia untuk pesakit yang akan menjalani kimo. Namun kerusi empuk tersebut tidak cukup untuk menghilangkan getar di hati. 



Nurse mula menjalankan tugas. satu-satunya bahagian yang paling tidak saya gemari ialah ketika pada proses permulaan utk menusuk jarum pda chemo port!! Arghhh..


jarum khas utk chemo port

Selepas itu, tiub2 hanya disambung pada tiub pendek yang telah disambung pada chemo port.



Bermula dengan dripping, kemudian saya diminta untuk menelan sebiji pil anti-vomit. Setengah jam selepas itu, lagi cecair anti-vomit disalurkan kepada saya melalui tiub. Setengah jam selepas itu pula, dadah kimo sebanyak 5  jarum 'gemuk' disalurkan kepada saya. Dua daripadanya berwarna merah dan tiga tanpa warna (jernih).

Kepala saya mulai berat dan perut mulai tidak selesa bila msuk jarum ke-4 dadah kimo memasuki badan saya.

Akhir sekali, saya harus menunggu selesainya 1 botol dripping dan kemudiannya proses 'flash' iaitu dengan menyalurkan sebanyak satu jarum kecil cecair tanpa warna sebelum saya dibenarkan pulang.

Ketidakselesaan pada kepala dan perut membuatkan saya tidur awal pada malam tersebut. perut seperti diserang gastrik. Sememangnya saya dibekalkan dengan ubat gastrik kerana ianya merupakan salah satu kesan sampingan dadah kimo tersebut.

Stok bekalan ubat selama 3 hari yang harus dihabiskan. Kebanyakkannya ialah ubat anti-muntah. Satu lagi ialah ubat gastrik dan yang botol itu ialah ubat kumur mulut (dry mouth)

Selebihnya sehingga ke hari ini, saya seperti biasa saja - seperti sebelum menjalani sesi rawatan kimo. Tidak ada apa yang menyukarkan saya. Tidak ada juga sebarang ketidakselesaan yang dirasai cuma agak lesu apabila menjelang petang. 

Semoga 'keselesaan' yang dirasai ini akan dirasai sepanjang sesi kimo saya. Insya-Allah..

Saya akan menjalani 16x sesi kimo. 4 sesi yang pertama setiap 3 minggu manakala selebihnya setiap minggu selama 12 minggu.

Dan seterusnya rawatan radioterapi selama 25x selama 25 hari berturut-turut!

Ya Allah.. Kau tabahkanlah dan kuatkanlah semangatku untuk melalui semua ujianMu ini ya Allah!

p/s : most of my friends who know bout my condition will surprise to see me who look really good - as if no sickness! Well, I don't think by looking sick will help, rite ppl! So, cheersss... :)

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

Wordless Wednesday - New Hair

At last, I did a hair cut!
It was done the following day after my 1st chemo!
In case you didn't notice, it's bob style!
Sempat lagi minta style2 even though they are going to drop sooner or later!
Huhuhuhu...

p/s : auto-published
Coming up next.. story on 1st chemo!

Friday, December 02, 2011

October's Cakes

Well, it's already the second day of December! Mau abis tahun sdh kan?!! 2012 is approaching!!

Sekarang baru mau post pasal October's cakes??!! Stale stories I have here... huhuhu... Just for my own 'record' ba... hehehe...

Cake 1 - Rayyan's birthday cake. He turned 3 years old on 24/10. We had a small makan-makan with hubby's siblings and mom on the 23/10 nite.


Ultraman for this year's theme!
Cuppies order from my colleague




Us with the cake!





Cake 2 - the 8th anniversary of our relationship fell on 25/10! Yes.. Rayyan was the great anniversary gift we had for our 5th anniversary! He arrived a day earlier! I remember very well we just text-ed and wishing each other as I was spending 2 nites at the hospital. 





And for this year, we cut the cake after the 'crying session'! That's the day when the biopsy's result is out!!! Takkan mau buang pula the cake kan.

The cake was pre-order a week earlier as I bought it via milkadeal.com months earlier. Kalau tidak redeem, sayang la kan... 

Don't think we'll having cake this month even though both hubby and I will be celebrating our birthdays this month. Mini cake pun belum tentu ada selera ni.. huhuhu...

Ok.. catch up with u guys later.. kinda nervous to go for my 1st chemo tomorrow.. aduiiii!!!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Seminggu Sebelum Kimo Pertama

My breast cancer journey!

Saya telah pun bertemu dengan dua orang Pakar Kanser/Oncologist untuk rawatan kimoterapi dan radioterapi iaitu Dr Albert Lim (Gleneagles) dan Dr John Loh (Pantai Bangsar). Disebabkan radioterapi memerlukan saya berulang alik ke hospital setiap hari selama 25 hari, saya memang berharap sangat utk mendapatkan rawatan di hospital yang lebih dekat dengan rumah saya - Gleneagles.

Namun cara konsultasi yang diberikan oleh Dr Albert membuatkan saya tawar hati. Cara penerangannya seperti mau tidak mau. Tidak penuh dengan informasi. Dia malah meminta saya untuk mendapatkan penerangan yang lebih lanjut dari jururawatnya! Huh!! 


Unit Oncology di Gleneagles
Sepertinya indah kabar dari rupa! Opps...

Bertemu dengan Dr John sebaliknya sungguh menyakinkan saya dan suami. Sama seperti Dr Patricia, beliau juga memberi penerangan yang jelas-sejelasnya. *suka*

Cancer Institute di Pantai Bangsar
Sangat selesa!
Rawatan kimoterapi dan radioterapi akan dibuat bilik yang bertulis "Chemo DayCare"

Dan saya memutuskan untuk memulakan kimo pertama pada Sabtu depan (3/12) di bawah Dr. John. Tipu kalau saya katakan tidak takut pada rawatan tersebut. Mungkin disogokkan dengan kesan-kesan sampingan yang bakal saya hadapi seperti kelesuan, kepanasan, muntah, mual dan loya, sembelit, bibir pecah, ulser mulut dan terutamanya rambut gugur!

Kepala botak??!! Oh no!!! Bagaimana hendak keluar rumah? Menggunakan skaf? Tudung? Rambut Palsu? Sebagai persediaan, saya telah pun membeli anak tudung. Rambut akan mula gugur pada minggu kedua setelah kimo pertama. Saya tidak mau anak-anak terkejut atau takut pada saya! Hmm..


saya ber-anak tudung!
Ada macam muka orang sakit?
Sejak kebelakangan ini saya banyak membaca pengalaman orang yang pernah menjalani kimo supaya saya lebih bersedia dengan apa yang bakal dilalui seminggu daripada sekarang. Saya tiada pilihan lain selain pasrah dan terus positif mengharungi hari-hari yang mendatang. Insya-Allah saya dapat mengharungi  ujian ini.

Semalam ('kemarin' kalau orang Sabah bilang), saya telah pun selamat menjalani pembedahan kecil untuk memasukkan chemo port di dada saya, seperti yang dicadangkan oleh Dr Patricia. Pembedahan kecil yang hanya memakan masa setengah jam sahaja dan tidak perlu bermalam di hospital.

Pendaftaran dibuat jam 7 pagi. Pembedahan (bius penuh) jam 8.30 pagi. Saya mula sedar pada jam 10 pagi. Pemeriksaan jantung dibuat pada jam 12 tengahari untuk memastikan tiada sebarang masalah. Saya kemudiannya dibenarkan pulang pada jam 3 petang!

Dengan chemo port, akan memudahkan proses kimo. Saya tidak akan sengsara menanggung kesakitan dicucuk jarum pada urat tangan.

Doktor memaklumkan jarum tidak boleh dicucuk pada urat yang sama pada setiap sesi kimo. Urat yang telah dicucuk akan tersumbat dan mengambil masa sehingga 3 bulan untuk sembuh. Makanya, percubaan utk mencari urat lain kadang kala sehingga tusukan jarum ke 7 utk  mendapat urat yang betul, tidak kah sakit kamu rasa?


Sangat tidak suka bila dicucuk dengan IV!

Sebaliknya, jarum akan dicucuk pada chemo port. Memudahkan dan mempercepatkan proses dan mengurangkan kesakitan pada tangan.

Area di mana chemo port iu ditanam akan tegang dan tidak begitu selesa ketika ini. Hmm..

Sehingga ke hari ini (sejak dimaklumkan tentang sakit ini), saya masih meneruskan aktiviti harian seperti biasa. Tidak ada apa yang harus saya tangisi kecuali ketika menerima berita tersebut dan juga utk beberapa jam yang pertama agak tertekan. Selebihnya sehingga ke hari ini, saya tetap seperti biasa.  Lagipun saya tidak merasa sakit yang amat.

Ketika tiub masih melekat di badan, saya masih bebas bergerak ke mana-mana. Saya ke fun fair dengan keluarga saya. Saya bershopping barang rumah. Saya lepak dengan kawan saya di Old Town White Coffee. Hehehee... Saya sangat ok ba!!! Yes, I mean it! ^_^

Ok.. sambung lagi..

Salam Maal Hijrah semua..

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Wordless Wednesday : Cancer Cure #2

Apricot Kernels
(click for more info)

Thanks to a colleague who has handed me with this.
Am now chewing about 12 kernels per day
besides the sabah snake grass

Psst... Aki.. saya tidak lupa itu broccoli! Hehe.. :)

My breast cancer journey!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

No updates

Hi peoples! Hope you guys are doing well. I'm fine here. :)

Well, as u can see I haven't update my blog since last Friday! *sigh* 

Am having problems with my broadband for the pass few days! Will be back after solved the issue ya.. Nda siok mau blog thru HP. Susah mau upload pics.. Huhu..

Thanks for stoppin' by.. Will blogwalk soon.. ^_^ 

Friday, November 11, 2011

The Report and Follow Ups!

My breast cancer journey!

Ok.. let's continue the previous entry.


Before that, thanks to Cath for the flower sent to my ward! Also, some colleaques and ex-colleague for fruits and Chicken Essence! Some visited me at home too...  So nice of you all.. *hugs*

Yup.. the report is out! *sigh*

Some facts :

* I am actually at Stage 2B (out of 4 stages) and Grade 3 (out of 3 grades)! Gosh.. this one really scared me to hell!! Grade 3 means those cells are spreading very very fast!!

* 3 out of 12 lympnodes has been infected. Hence, full clearance/removal of the lympnodes has been done.

* a test on the woman hormones also resulted positive which means have to be on medicine for 5 years! In other words, not advisable to conceive at least 2 years as it is very risky.

Follow up treatments :

1. 6 cycles of chemotherapy which to be done once every 3 weeks! Will have to be on MC during the chemo. Should be about 4-5 mths MC! Cost involves approx RM5k per cycle (in private hosp).

2. After chemo is radiotheraphy 25 times.. 5mins daily!! Cost involves approx RM8k for all 25x.

3. Then only start with the 5-years-medicine which will cost me approx RM150 per mth.

Well.. have checked with HR if the company is ok with the 1+5months MC.. Sendiri mau ingat la kan!! Long mc ba tu!! Silap haribulan kena kasi resign owh!! And I am very speechless when the HR assures me that the company/company insurance will take care of all the costs and I'll be on paid MC for 6 months (approx)!! Syukur Alhamdulillah..

Terhutang budi betul sama my boss!! I am aware that the green light is from my boss! Thanks Datuk!

On other thoughts, I guess my back-for-good plan has to be postponed for couple years! I know it is still too early to plan for anything but I can't help but to think bout this one. I can't just hand over the 'love-letter' to the company after all the helps kan?! Hmm...

Anyway, gonna meet Dr Patricia with the Oncologist on the 19/11. they will then advise further on the chemo. I'm kinda nervous bila fikir psl tu chemo.

I was told that I will be very weak for 3-4 days after the chemo jap.. Hair loss is the common side effect.. Hmm..

I don't think I have other choice here am I?! So yeah.. I really hope that I have all the strength, mentally and physically to go for the chemo! InsyaAllah..

Till then.. you all take care ya.. have a great weekend!

Pssttt... today is 11.11.11!! What a nice number! Any special agenda for today? ^_^

Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Wordless Wednesday - Cancer Cure

My breast cancer journey!

Sabah Snake Grass / Pokok Belalai Gajah

Bought the plant @ RM10 at Jelebu, Seremban

In my case, am chewing approx 30pcs of the leaves daily! *sigh*


Psst.. for those in Sabah.. di sana senang cari ni tumbuhan!

Monday, November 07, 2011

On CONFINEMENT

My breast cancer journey!

Oppsss.. lebih kurang macam itu la yang saya rasa sekarang ini!

Hi all!! How are you?? Hope you all are doing well..

Well, as you all know.. the operation went well on last Tuesday! Operation to remove lumps and lymp nodes which have been affected too! 

31.10.11

8.30pm - admission at Hospital Pantai Bangsar (Ward D336)

12.00am - start fasting

1.11.11 (nice date huh!)

7.00am - getting ready for operation - in blue gown!


The blue operation-gown!

7.15am - a jap on the b@tt!!

7.30am - send to OT. Start mamai sudah sini. Seram betul bila kena letak betul2 di bawah lampu bulat dalam OT! And the last thing I could recall is that the doc is giving me a jap on my left arm! Ubat bius yang buat saya pengsan for more than 3 hours!

10.50am - mula sedar! dapat rasa ngilu di bahagian breast. cuba buka mata yg berat and was trying to read the wall clock few times! I was at the ICU, for their monitoring purposes. I was then send back to my bed.

Before the nurse is going to leave me, dalam keadaan yang tersangat mamai, saya minta tolong the nurse untuk kasi keluar hp saya dari dalam laci yg berkunci di tepi katil.

I need to inform hubby/family that I'm back to my bed! I know they have been waiting for my call.

Mom woke me up softly when they arrived. My kids were there too. Rayyan looking at me weirdly. He also refused Ryanna to sit at the bed as if he doesn't want Ryanna to disturb me! Hubby and mom take turn to feed me with porridge. I'm so touched! 


The mamai face yang kelaparan! Abis licin itu porridge! Hee..


I only feel better and stable in the evening as I already able to go to the toilet on my own!

I was finally discharged on Thursday with a tube hanging underneath the armpit! *sigh*


The tubes!!

"Ba.. Sudah2 la ko tu.. Malam sdh ni.. Sudah2 la tu shopping!" hubby is teasing me as I have to carry the tube-bag 24hours!! Cisss...

Oh ya.. was given one month MC!!

By the way, I'm ok.. no pain.. only kinda numb on the right arms due to the removal of lymp nodes.. can't wait to remove this tube! I look really sick with the tube!! Huh!!

To be continued..

Salam AidilAdha and Happy Holiday to all of you.. ^_^

Sunday, October 30, 2011

2nd Opinion

My breast cancer journey!

Hi everyone!

Well, news spread around at the office. When I came in to office last Thursday, I have to 'make report' to everyone that I bumped to. I know everyone is concern and shocked too... They all gave me a lot of advices. I feel so touched.

My dearly Datuk-Boss has arranged the HR Manager to accompany me to see his friend - a doctor who is also one of the company Director. In other words, the HR Manager was also my driver for the day! Oppss...

Thursday morning, we went to see Dr Ong at Assunta Hospital. Dr Ong is actually the Physcian. He receommends me to see Prof Yip (UM) and Dr Patricia Gomez (Pantai Bangsar), top doc in breast cancer.

We go for Dr Patricia Gomez as Prof Yip would be slightly hard to catch. Dr Ong straight away called Dr Patricia to make appointment. We were asked to come at 2pm at the same day!

Even though we had appointment, it is still 'first-come-first-serve basis. We only managed to went in to see Dr. Patricia at 4pm! Phewww..

The moment Dr Patricia starts explaning, I knew that I'm going to stick with her. I like the way she explains. Very details! She wrote stage by stage all treatments that I would be going thru depending on my case which they would only find out during the operation. She is also very positive. Unlike Dr Teo, the prev doc I met at Hospital Pantai Ampang. The way he broke the news sound serious and seems no hope except I have to remove the whole breast!

Treatment as advised:

1. First thing first, surgery to remove the lumps. I am so relief that I can still preserved my breast! During the surgery, they will do some tests if the lymp nodes has been attacked. Lymp nodes is the first area will be attacked when one have breast cancer. 

2. Radiotheraphy - is a must! 25x for 5mins daily which start after 3 weeks. 

3. Chemotheraphy - depends. If lymp nodes attacked, then must go for chemo. Looking at my age, Dr says will want me to go for chemo at least 4 cycles!

Well, she asked me not wait longer. Need to avoid the cancer spreading.

So, yeah.. will be admitting tomorrow nite and surgery will be on Tuesday morning (at Hospital Pantai KL - Bangsar). I can be discharged the very next day but with tubes. To come back after 4 days to remove tubes and rest for at least 1 month at home!! Radiotherapy/ chemo starts after 3 weeks!

To recap.. read also the other entries as well.. Breast Lump, Biopsy DoneBiopsy Result.


Till then, pray for me k.. InsyaAllah will fight this 'obstacle'!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Wordless Wednesday : Birthday Boy!

Happy Birthday to you Rayyan Adrian!


p/s : auto-published! Happy Deepavali to all.. :)

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Biopsy Result!

My breast cancer journey!

Just to update..

As most of you already know..

Have collected the biopsy result about 2 hours ago!

As suspected by the doctor, the lump at the n*pple area is cancerous!!! It should be around 6 mths already! And is now at early Stage 2!

For a moment, I just smile and nodded at the doc before I took out tissue! *teary eyes*

Hubby was with me to calm me down. Thanks Hubby!

Doctor's advice:

1. Go for operation to remove whole right breast. In my case, need to operate the lymp nodes in the armpit as well. Sorry I can't explain this part.

2. Since my case involve the lymp nodes, will have to comes for follow up every week after operation.

3. After 3 weeks to 1month after operation, to go for chemotherapy and radiotherapy for at least 6 mths!

Supposed to admit for operation on this Thursday but with Boss's advices.. will go for 2nd opinion doctor first before proceed with operation! Thanks boss for the concern!

Ok.. i better stop.. don't worry... I'll be ok.. I'll be strong.. I'll be positive!!

Thanks to all of you! You guys take care too ya!!

The 8th Year!!

As much as I want to blog about Rayyan's birthday which we celebrated in advance on Sunday nite, you guys still have to wait coz I forgot to bring the memory card! Without picies, entry would be not-so interesting kunun! Heee...

What's up with my title there??



Well, today is our 8th years couple anniversary! Phewww... 

I know I know most of you has longer relationship than mine! I know too that masing² ada masing² punya asam garam! Lain rumah lain tangga! Heeee..

This year, the feeling (my own feeling) is kinda... how to say ya... well, maybe because of the recent news... it makes me think a lot! As much as I want to stay positive... I am just human being ba kan

Last nite when taking bath, sempat juga layan perasaan! Hmmm... Was thinking how long will our relationship last? My confident level dropped when I imagine myself without the other 'mountain'! I think more or less it would lessen hubby's passion towards me! You know what I'm referring here! I started imagine if he would have an affair!!! Sh*t!!! Hate it when I let the imaginations run wild! *sigh*

Whatever it is.. jodoh & ajal-maut di tangan Tuhan. Saya redha... Till then, am gonna treasure my life to the fullest!

Two become One! One come Two! *wink*
To dearest Hubby, I love you so much! Pls forgive me for all the wrong-doings.. sins... the ignorance (too occupied with kids!).. and every single thing.. Still trying best to be a good wifey.. except the kitchen part! Memang surrender owh!! Hahahahahah... 

Last but not least.... Happy 8th Anniversary to you, Hubby! 

Monday, October 24, 2011

Biopsy Done!!

My breast cancer journey!

Hi people! Am back with not-so-stable feelings!

Before that, Happy 3rd birthday to my Hero, Rayyan Adrian! We love you son! We had the makan-makan last nite. Will blog about it in my next entry ya.

As promised, here’s my story on what happened last Friday. Sorry for the long wait… Kunun!

9.00am – registration at Hospital Pantai Ampang.   

Even though I already made my appointment, still it is a 'first-come-first-serve' basis.
Perhaps I was quite early, so masih kosong lagi!

9.40am – met Dr Teo, Surgeon Specialist. Macam biasa la.. sessi sual-kenal & soal-jawab! After studied the scan by the National Cancer Society, I have to lied down and kena ramas² lagik!! *benci!* Was asked to do another scan ultrasound and also Mammogram! I was puzzled when he asked me to do Mammogram. Then, he explained. Mammogram is usually for ladies 35 and above. But, in some cases, Mammogram will still show the cancer existence, if any! Besides, mine got two lumps. One is exactly at n*pple which are bad! *sweating*

10.00am – 11.30am – waiting turn for ultrasound and mammogram!

The Mammogram machine and the result

11.30am - 12.00pm – see Doc again with the results. Base on the Mammogram, Doc said if it’s cancer, there will be white dots on the lumps. Was quite relief to hear that there is no white dots on my lump. I think he only mentioned that at 1 lump and not the other lump on the n*pple!

Biopsy is a must!!

Since I’m using the company insurance, I will be only covered if I am admitted or at least a day care (which required at least 6 hours at the Hospital) before I can proceed with the Biopsy.

12.00pm – 1.45pm – waiting for them to prepare the necessary for admission and get ‘green light’ from Insurance. While waiting, sempat la juga had a light lunch – currypuff and ice tea. Mana ada selera owh!

1.45pm – 6.45pm – due to ‘no-bed’ at the female ward, was asked to admit at Pediatric Ward. It’s a two-bedded room with toilet and tv on each bed. I was on my own the whole afternoon. Waiting, waiting and waiting for Doc to perform Biopsy!! At the end, was asked to go back and come back tomorrow morning at 8am! Bikin panas kan??!!!

My room!

Tea time and dinner!
Looking the 'kaki lima', bikin takut oo kan?!

The next day…

7.20am – Morning ‘alarm’ by the Hospital. To come as soon as possible. Doctor is waiting!

8.00am – admitted at female’s ward. 

8.15am – 8.30am – Biopsy room! *faint* Before that, Doctor apologized about yesterday. He claimed that he went to the Biopsy room but I was not there and he was not informed that I was at the Pediatric ward! Huh?!!

To perform Biopsy, Doc injected me for the ‘bius’ on the breast of coz. After that, he asked for 7 size blade from the nurse!! OMG!! Kenapa la I have to listen to that?!! Yeah, he made a small cut on the breast. Of coz I can’t feel anything. It’s already numb maa… Then the Biopsy began!! I have to bear 8 times of samples-taking!! Gila eh!! I dare not to look at the breast, if you ask! He cleans up everything, plaster and done! Rasa macam kena tikam opss.. not really.. but you can feel he’s 'stabbing' on you softly and the pull’s part yang paling tidak best! Wuaaaa…

Next, can go back to bed and wait for discharge! Doc’s advice??!! It is really beyond my imagination and expectation! Trust me, no woman will want to hear this!!

“If it’s only here, I can just remove this part (pointing at the other lump). But, this one right at the n*pple is very high chances to get cancer. So, I have to remove the whole breast! Otherwise, you still can preserve your breast!!”

Apa kamu rasa?? Urin??!!

Seriously, I can’t feel anything! I can’t think of anything! I was shocked!

8.30am – 11.30am – As informed, discharged process will take about 2-3 hours. So, I just stayed at my bed, waiting while sms-ing my hubby and bbm-ing my colleague updating them the current status!

“takkan kau nak buang semua beb??” that statement really hit me and I burst into tears!!

I managed to calm myself down after hubby replied me with “it’s ok.. just go ahead! Better than to get cancer!!”

11.30am – discharged! Total bill = RM1,600++ (Thanks to the Company!) To come again on Tuesday (tomorrow) to see doctor and collect the biopsy’s result.

If you ask me now… the result is no longer important to me coz whatever it is... I will still lost one of the asset!! Wuarghhhhh…

Anyway, thank you for all the encouraging words specially beloved hubby and mom for the positive supports. Without them, I am totally down!

Thanks also to Sis Mouren for the advice! I like it the most… “Yang penting sekarang, ko mesti go ahead with life. Ko mesti tengok anak ko membesar. Biar lah ilang sebelah breast, yang penting tidak ilang nyawa ko!” Macam terbangun saya baca!!

Thank you again. Will be fine and stay positive! *wink*

Sorry for the long post!

Friday, October 21, 2011

Hospitalization!

My breast cancer journey!

It's Friday! Good morning people!

As you are reading this, I am actually at the Hospital Pantai Ampang, seeing the Surgeon Specialist. *dag dig dug*

Yeah.. it's an auto-published entry.

Was thinking to just come in late to the office today but of coz depending on the consultation. If it takes longer time, then I have to take half day leave. If the doctor is taking the sample this morning, then I am thinking to ask for MC. Muaahahah... let see how ya..

Am actually so happy when the HR informed me that she has checked with the company insurance agent. My case is covered under the whatever-plan it is. So, I can bring the medical card (provided by the company some time this year! we do not have it before.) together with the reports to any of the private hospital to perform treatment/surgery with FOC. Phewww...

It's indeed a good news to me! 

Immediately, I made an appointment to see the surgeon specialist this morning at Hospital Pantai Ampang. The Hospital is only less than 10minutes drive from home. *wink*

Am not saying the government hospital is not good ok but at least the waiting time and appointments dates will be much much lesser. With government hospital, the next appointment date given will be at least another 3 weeks, the earliest! *faint* Really need to close the 'case' soonest possible la

So far that I can recall, this visit would be my first time getting treatment at private hospital! 


Well, I must say that I seldom get sick. I only admitted to hospital (government) 3 times in my entire life.

The first one was when I broke my arm when i'm was in kindergarden. I was warded for a mth if not mistaken and I missed the graduation ceremony! *sad*

Can you guess the second and third???   

Yup, when I delivered Rayyan and Ryanna!

Other than that, just the normal sakit-sakit-manja! Ahahaha..

Oppsss... Ok.. I better stop. Tertukar cerita sudah ni... hehehe... Will update when I'm back ok!

Till then, Happy Friday and have a great weekend ya!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Bermalas-Malasan

Hari itu, c Kay Masingan sudah dilanda malas. So, hari ini turn saya pula!

Hari ini saya terasa amat malas sekali! Boss pula sdh 1 week outstation! Coming in next Monday!


Kemarin, saya sibuk kasi siap my Photobook! Voucher expiring in 2015 tapi saya rasa baik la saya buat awal² sementara masih duduk makan gaji buta di ofis ni sbb kalau sdh balik KK next May, saya rasa saya mesti tidak akan dapat buat itu Photobook. Sia² pula saya bayar RM99!!

Sepatutnya saya mau kasi surprise hubby with the photobook. It's the journey of our love which we call it Taste of Love! Tapi seperti biasa, kami laki-bini memang suka berbincang walau hal remeh sekalipun! Itu la ba yang sepatutnya kan?! Heeee... 

So, hari ini saya sudah pun mem-print 40 pages of the photobook utk approval boss ku! ^_^ Biasanya, memang standard la ada komen² itu dan ini kan dan seperti biasanya juga akan diakhiri dengan "Ba, mana² seja la!" Kalau saya rajin, saya adjust la mana² komen yang boleh diterimapakai. Kalau tidak, ignore it lor! Kiikikikiki..

Kamu mau tengok the photobook?? Since it is my first time, saya just pakai apa yang ada. Malas mau fikir banyak. Background pun hitam seja! Nanti, kalau sdh sampai saya blog out ok!

Disebabkan malas juga, petang ini saya just browse the net. Cari info pasal Cameron Highlands and Singapore. Next holiday will be Cameron Highlands in Jan 2012, follow by Singapore in March! Did I mention Medan in May, KK in May and Manila in September??!!! *faint*

Bila terpikir pasal bajet terus pening! Aduhhhhh...

Ok.. chow dulu!! *malas*

Win a 3 Days 2 Nights Stay for 2 at the Pangkor Laut Resort!




Grand Prize
3 Days 2 Nights stay for 2 at the Pangkor Laut Resort
Daily Breakfast at the Feast Village, Lunch at Royal Bay Beach Club or Chapman's Bar and a Set Dinner at Uncle Lim's Kitchen or Feast Village
Return Ferry Transfer for 2 adults
Travel Period: March 2012
Consolation Prize
5 x RM50 DealCity Credits

How to Join the Contest
  • * Register at DealCity.com.my as a member 
  • * Click on the "BUY" icon for the contest and proceed to 'buy' the contest at zero cost (no credit card details required)
  • * You are now in the running to win the prize! 

Good luck! *wink*

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Wordless Wednesday : Kekuatanku

Masa berlalu begitu pantas
dan setiap kali melihat telatah mereka
"besar sudah dorang kan?"
satu ayat yang selalu aku lontar!
Mereka adalah KEKUATAN aku!
Mummy sayang kamu!
Selamat Hari Rabu! ^_^

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Woman’s Talk : Breast Lump!

My breast cancer journey!

*Inhale* *exhale*

It’s Pink October month! Have you check yours? Have you done with the BSE (Breast Self-Examination) To be honest, I rarely done mine.

And I thank the instinct or should I say the warning given to me that nite (last Sunday) during my shower.

To detect something is not rite really surprise me! It is on the right one! Head began questioning and kinda worry also. Not to worry is impossible!

Informed hubby when I went to bed that nite. Asked him to feel it too. However, dia dengan mamai nya ckp, “nanti pigi check aa..”

The next day, started my Google at office and asked for advices from the senior kakak².

Finally, informed Mom bout it. When it comes to health, Mom will be one among the last person that I want to inform. I just don’t want her to worry.

Actually, Mom went through this lump thingy before. I remember very well that she had been warded a nite for an operation to remove the lump. Thanks God it was not a cancer. That is where I gain the strength to stay calm and think positive. Hoping and praying that I'll be alright. 

So, last Friday I went for a Breast Ultrasound at National Cancer Society Malaysia. (I was informed that Mammogram is only recommended for ladies above 35 years old.)

The front desk

Bikin kembang bulu juga masuk the building. huhuhu..

My appointment was at 11am. Been called by a lady doctor for a manual check and been waited until 12.30pm for my turn for the ultrasound! Baik tidak payah buat appointment kan?!

It took only 15minutes to finish the process. It's like what pregnant mommies go for the baby ultrasound. Only the 'area' yang lain!

The worst part is being "molested" by a guy-doctor! Hishhh... 

Ok.. here's the report by the doctor :


"There is an irregular hypoechoic mass in the right breast at 12 o'clock, corresponding to the palpable lump, measuring 12 x 7 x 13mm. There are multiple well defined hypoechoic masses in the right subareolar area. The largest measures 10mm. No focal mass in the left breast. The mass in the right breast at 12 o'clock is suspicious of malignancy BIRADS. BIOPSY IS RECOMMENDED"

*inhale* *exhale*

As for the service charge, it is actually RM100 for the breast ultrasound. Upon collecting the reports, the lady at the front desk says “no charges”.  Without asking further, I say ok and thank you. Heee…

Straight away, we went to Hospital Ampang which is near my house and less crowd than Hospital Kuala Lumpur. Mmg tiada orang di sana. Pesakit pun kurang. Staff pun kurang!

We were asked to go straight to the Klinik Pembedahan (aduiii naa… bikin takut ja oo!!). Went there just to set an appointment date which is on the 8/11/11! Punya lama lagi kan… bikin tambah risau seja ni!

In the meantime, am asking the company HR to check if our medical card covers my case. If yes, memang tidak teragak-agak saya proceed at the private hospital!

Till then, pray for me ya friends!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Ready for Just Shoppe Trading!

Hi people!

Was on 'MC' last Friday. Will blog about it later.

Finally, the biz kits are ready! Well, I must say that I'm a fussy customer! It should be about 4 drafts before I final them! Sorry AnnieMing!

Yeah.. you read me!

Disebabkan geram sama c AnnieMing punya Smooched Marble, so saya dengan tebal mukanya sent email to her requesting her to design for me a set of header, namecard and logo/watermark for my Shoppe. ;p

My original version
Final draft by AnnieMing
Heart the cartoon BO very much!
designed as per the customer's request
macam² ba the customer kan.. ;p

Can't wait to send the namecard for printing.. hehehe.. 

Pls contact AnnieMing personally should you require her design services. 

THANKS again Annie! *wink*

Happy Monday!!